Picture this: you wake up from a nap. Not a great nap, but a good one nonetheless. You checked all your media outlets prior to falling asleep so you know’d what was there and what would be new upon your wake. Well, you log onto your favorite site only to find that someone has commented all too radically on your blog located on a different site and used really nasty, low-down, triflin' language when they did so.
This happened to me, my people. Yes, it ACTUALLY HAPPENED. Suffice to say I was on my way IN…
Now, I talks about folks that I DON’T KNOW for the purposes of entertainment. Why, dear God(t) WHY, would somebody come for me like this and I DO know them?? You thought that you would be spared the wrath just ‘cuz you in my lifespace sporadically? Well let me say you thought WRONG, heffa! iAin’ts the one to come for ‘specially when I have not sent for you!
After having a session with the rest of the Ig Council, we have decided that the most proper course of action is to address ALL the people like the one above who so often overstep their bounds and create their own reality that they have almost completely detached themselves from THIS reality. With that in mind, let ANGSTY THURSDAY begin!
To officially start this special IGsational event, to all the people who think they can say whatever they want, do whatever they want, and attack whomever they want, I shall open the Book of FridayAfterNext and read from Chapter MissPearlie, Verses 2-3: And verily I say unto thee: TODAY is the day you muthaf@#$%*s is gon’ KICK IN!
Let me tell YOU somethin'!: Stans are the worst type of people. For those that may be unfamiliar with the term “Stan,” you remember that one Eminem song with Dido singing real scared-like “My tears gon’ cold, I’m wonderin’ why-y-y-y?” and the obsessed fan colored his hair and killed himself and was like rubbing Em’s cds all over his pubies and what not? (Ok, maybe that last part didn’t happen, but I’m sure you remember it now)
Now, I talks about folks that I DON’T KNOW for the purposes of entertainment. Why, dear God(t) WHY, would somebody come for me like this and I DO know them?? You thought that you would be spared the wrath just ‘cuz you in my lifespace sporadically? Well let me say you thought WRONG, heffa! iAin’ts the one to come for ‘specially when I have not sent for you!
After having a session with the rest of the Ig Council, we have decided that the most proper course of action is to address ALL the people like the one above who so often overstep their bounds and create their own reality that they have almost completely detached themselves from THIS reality. With that in mind, let ANGSTY THURSDAY begin!
To officially start this special IGsational event, to all the people who think they can say whatever they want, do whatever they want, and attack whomever they want, I shall open the Book of FridayAfterNext and read from Chapter MissPearlie, Verses 2-3: And verily I say unto thee: TODAY is the day you muthaf@#$%*s is gon’ KICK IN!
Let me tell YOU somethin'!: Stans are the worst type of people. For those that may be unfamiliar with the term “Stan,” you remember that one Eminem song with Dido singing real scared-like “My tears gon’ cold, I’m wonderin’ why-y-y-y?” and the obsessed fan colored his hair and killed himself and was like rubbing Em’s cds all over his pubies and what not? (Ok, maybe that last part didn’t happen, but I’m sure you remember it now)
Well, people who go to any lengths to suffuse their being with whatever products the celebrity creates/endorses and then goes on a rampage should something negative be written/said pertaining to said celebrity are known as Stans. In this day and age, Beyonce Stans are definitely among the WORST of THE WORST. Anyone close to me will tell you that while I am not a Beyonce “fan,” I do enjoy a few of her songs and respect her talent and ability to entertain. I do believe, however, that she goes way too far way too often and I WILL comment on it whenever I see’s it. I love Whitney Houston more than any other artist, but guess what? She smoked crack for the greater part of this decade. I will tear a club UP if one of my Britney joints come through the speakers! But in case you didn’t notice, she lost her mind for about 5 years. I still supported her, Whitney, and any and everyone else that I love, but I don’t BLINDLY hold fast to them as though God told their mothers to follow a star to a manger to give birth to them on a cold Winter night. Seriously, Beyonce Stans think she shoots sunbeams from her ass and moonlight from her vajajay. I understand the confusion; they are more than likely just looking at the crystals, rhinestone, gems, and bedazzled embellishments on her tragic House of Dereon wardrobe. But if anybody thinks that I will be silenced simply because I receive comments with dissenting viewpoints, kick Everest.
To all the Stans, let me go real hard, list style:
1) Respond appropriately. If you read something in a blog with comments enabled, don’t go to Facebook and write on someone’s Wall, especially if your viewpoint is disgustingly offensive and proactively bitchy. If I Tweet somebody, they shouldn’t send me a message back on MySpace! If I tell somebody something in person, they shouldn’t run to the nearest computer to IM me their reaction! Learn how to respond, silly ass rabbit!
To all the Stans, let me go real hard, list style:
1) Respond appropriately. If you read something in a blog with comments enabled, don’t go to Facebook and write on someone’s Wall, especially if your viewpoint is disgustingly offensive and proactively bitchy. If I Tweet somebody, they shouldn’t send me a message back on MySpace! If I tell somebody something in person, they shouldn’t run to the nearest computer to IM me their reaction! Learn how to respond, silly ass rabbit!
2) Do unto others… To use inflammatory and purposeful language is just soliciting a mutual response. I say what I say understanding and flat out expecting the same to be said to me, but Stans don't quite get that idea. If you can’t handle someone saying to you what you say to them, STFU and SI’DOWN!
Lastly, and perhaps most important, fellow IGs and those opposed to the Power of IG,
3) Know your role. As a budding actor, I sometimes have trouble staying in character given everything that is going on around me. And for the aforementioned person and all of her counterparts, apparently the same is true. For the time that we were cool, we were cool – but you weren’t ever a supa-close friend or nothin’. Nor do we stay in touch consistently now. So what makes you think you can say something to me – on a public forum, no less – that most of my BEST friends wouldn’t fix their lips to spew? For the people that “habitually line-step” c/o Charlie Murphy and Rick James, please know and understand this truth: you are EXTRAS. Production assistants at BEST. And what do extras do? They smile politely but SILENTLY interact, do their choreographed/planned steps and movements in the BACKGROUND, and get in and out of the scene without being noticed. Every now and again they may have a line of dialogue or two, but never enough to pull focus from the STAR. And now, because you tried to AD LIB something that was NOT in the script, your scene ends up on the CUTTING ROOM FLOOR.
As we continue ANGSTY THURSDAY, we ask that you visit the following to further delve into the multifaceted issues therein: Awesomely Luvvie | KindredSmile | NaturallyAlise
