7/28/2009

I'm bout that Freedom. What u bout?

Posted by Luvvie | Labels: , ,

It was 1am and me, VEG (aka Crazy Magnet) and Overit (aka ZeeBaby) were group-chatting on GMail and it led to this conversation about Harriet Tubman. She was a saint (like Dorothy Mantooth).

Overit: I’m pretty sure Harriet Tubman woulda loved to lay up in a hammock reading freedom papers, but again, people have been rude since the dawn of time
VEG: lmao at reading freedom papers. I loved when I read in school how Harriet carried a pistol and threaten to shoot fools who were to too tired to keep going where they stood!
Overit: LMAO @ Harriet!!!!
VEG: and yeah: Harriet was gangsta. "You keep walking to freedom or you die right here!"
Luvvie: and Harriet was the FIRST gangsta.
Overit: mini overit confession: I used to be kinda intimidated by her (I knew she was dead) but she was antebellum HOOD
Luvvie: lmao!!! Not antebellum hood
Overit: like, would she have shot me??
VEG: lmao. She was like 'you ain't gonna stop so you can get caught and mess this up'. Harriet got you to freedom whether you were serious about it or not. She LEFT her two brothers who were late to show up at the meeting spot. They weren't about freedom. How you gone be late to the escape?
Luvvie: hahahaha Harriet: "Bitch, is u down for freedom or what??? cuz I aint got NO time to play these bald-headed shackled games w/ u. U in, or out? WassUp??"
VEG: Harriet: "I'm bout this freedom. What you bout?"
Luvvie: I imagine Harriet to be an antebellum madea
VEG: bwaaaah at antebellum madea
Luvvie: hahahaha!! not "I’m bout this freedom. what u bout?" dead

Harriet: "I'm bout this freedom. What u bout?"

VEG: I try to imagine: would have left my brothers? Answer: yes. lol
Overit: LMBAO exactly! I have 4, so I know ONE of them would be left
Luvvie: lmao and u KNO Africans cant b on time
Overit: and id hope it was the youngest, mute ass ninja
Luvvie: underground railroad is sposed to be well-oiled machine. Negros gon have u late as hell. Massa woulda BEEN caught up to the plan effing w/ Africans
Overit: moody and don’t ever talk, then once a yr he wanna fill you in on what he been thinking the whole yr, poof! vamoose
VEG: of all times to be on time, this was most important. I think making sure you make your connection with the freedom train is critical.
Luvvie: LMAO!! Z!!
Overit: id take a nap to prepare for the long trip ahead
Luvvie: ur youngest bro don’t say jack??
VEG: LMAO @ Z
Overit: he is so WEIRD
Luvvie: well it means he can keep a secret. we can give HIM the code to spread to the others
Overit: then he comes up to me twice a yr tryin CONVERSATE
Luvvie: hahaha conversate
Overit: and everyone cuts their eyes @ me like "he done chose u to speak with, speak to him"
Luvvie: hahahahahaha as they shine a spotlight on u
VEG: Z, I think he'd make the freedom train. lol. Seems to me he'd be on time.
Luvvie: yup he aint gon b behind makin convos like the rest of the late coloreds
VEG: He won't be chit chatting, saying goodbye and ish
Luvvie: or tellin someone they aint shit cuz u kno we good for that
Overit: oh no, he would have been at the site, RET TO GO
VEG: Can't you see it? 'I'm heading north today and I wanted to let you know, before I go, I hate you azz'
Luvvie: hahahahahaha *dies* "let me take this opportunity to tell u that ur mama aint shit. goodbye. see u on the free side"
VEG: lmao I'd have done that
Overit: girl, so would I. "bitch, chicken george be thankin bout me when he out in the field with you"
Luvvie: i'da been late talkin shit bout what I was gon do up north
VEG: LMAO at Z
Luvvie: and how I was gon rock them "city folks gear" hahahahahahahahaha
VEG: when I gets free...
Luvvie: NOT chicken george!!!!
Overit: WHAT IS WRONG WITH US?
Luvvie: iCANNOT w/ us!!
VEG: Nothin. Araminta Ross is a she-ro. She deserves to be celebrated
Overit: I have long been intrigued by george and kizzy. ole kambe bolongo faces. LMBAO @ bell atlantics voice
Luvvie: bwahahahaha
Overit: that's what I call him btw
Luvvie: isweahfoVishnu I need to quit u
VEG: my older brother would be late to the freedom train cuz he'd be trying to get these damn kids together. I’d be like 'hurry up now. we got to move'
Luvvie: I’d be late cuz I’d b draggin my sack of rice I aint wanna leave to waste
VEG: LMAO To you I'd say "negrette. How u gone cook that rice? We can't start a fire. It'll attract the dogs! Drop that ish"
Overit: I’d be late cause Harriet and I were beat on the same day, I'm narcoleptic too. and I KNOW id get beat, I just got an attitude with a cop in dc. My girl was talking btwn her teeth like "iswearzifyouhaveusherelongerthanweshouldimanevaspeaktoyouagain"
Luvvie: lmao
Overit: I was like, get off my seat!

We are dumb and ridiculous! Then as if that wasn't foolish enough, VEG went and wrote a poem for our she-ro, Harriet. It went a lil something like this:


This is dedicated to Araminta Ross, aka Harriet Tubman, bka Lady Moses, i.e. The Original Antebellum Gangsta

Ms. Tubman you gave us free.
When we were too tired to keep it movin'.
Your revolver put life in our tired feet.

"Go on or die" you said
While you held the muzzle to our head.

You was 'bout dat freedom
And if a fool was late you'd leave 'em.

Leading mo fos through the bush,
On a trip that was so far.
Dodging dogs and massa
Following that north star.

Comin' back again and again
Risking yo own life
To bring others to that freedom light.

Leading armed revolts
Telling white suffragists where they could go.

Yous one badass bish.

Weezy, Jeezy, Dopey and Sneezy...
They ain't got nuthin on you, a real gangsta.

*DEAD*. iQuit ALL of us. We are RUDE. This is what happens when you don't go to bed on time.

JBSSFAOU (Guess that Jeebs be... reference)

Oh and since Harriet was bout that freedom, What U BOUT? Tell us!

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7/14/2009

Weeping Wally

Posted by KindredSmile | Labels: , , ,

The landscape surrounding Igville is more barren than Stevie's temples. Below, please find a post from my archives to liven up the place.

***********

One of my very first suitors in college was a guy who happened to be in two of my classes. Although I'm sure a variation of the "college goggles" were in effect, he was a cutie, and I was eager to sow some Kindred oats to branch out and take chances. So, we went to the Black Creativity exhibit at the Museum of Science & Industry (sidenote: game or not, this was an awesome exhibit that centered on Black innovations in technology). Things were going wonderfully (he uses big words in context! he's a gentleman! he's witty!) until we stumbled upon a panel discussing the lack of available technology in poor minority communities.

Let me preface this by saying that I feel very strongly about this topic. I grew up poor. I still am poor. If it wasn't for the Apple IIe's at the community library, I wouldn't have been introduced to computers until at least junior high (whatchu know bout that Number Munchers? Oregon Trail?!).


However, my frustration at the lack of current technology and the resulting education gap was no match for his. He got into a fervent argument with some unenlightened fool, and instead of wordsmithing him to death, this ninja started crying. Like, for real you guys. No lie. At first, I thought that maybe the air was exceptionally dusty and his allergies were flaring up, but then he started snotting and his voice started cracking and there was no escaping the fact that I was out on a date with a Weepy Will, a Sobbing Rob, a Bawling Ben. So, after gingerly asking him if he was alright, I went to the bathroom to call my Mom - her advice never steered me wrong. The conversation went like this:

Me: Ma! I'm out with [snotface] and he's CRYIN!
Mom: Why? What you do to him? [ed. note: Why was that her first reaction? WTF, Mama?]
Me: I ain't even do nothing! We at the museum and he just started crying down for no reason.
Mom: [giggles]
Me: Ma, this is NOT funny! What I'm supposed to do? I mean, I offered him a tissue...
Mom: Wait, you still there? [Gov't name], come home NOW.
Me: But I think he's still crying. What if he's dying or something? Maybe he's stressed out.
Mom: He ain't dying, he's crazy. Come HOME. This just like that episode of Law & Order! Hurry up before you end up in the alley somewhere.

So, I left. And the next time I saw him, he refused to make eye contact. It went this way for the rest of the semester, until one day he came up to me and made small talk as if nothing ever happened. That creeped me out way more than the blubbering did.
It was a longer time before I returned to the Museum.

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